A young boy and a bunch of misfit friends embark on a quest to find a dark magic item of ultimate power before a diabolical tyrant can.

Eilonwy: I'm Princess Eilonwy. Are you a lord, or a warrior?
Taran: Uh, no. Uh... I-I-I'm an assistant pig keeper.
Eilonwy: Oh, what a pity. I was so hoping for someone who could help me escape. Oh, well, if you want to come with me, you may.
Eilonwy: Oh, Taran, I'm afraid it'll soon be over for us.
Taran: I hadn't planned it to end like this, Eilonwy.
Fflewddur Fflam: Oh, I wish I'd stayed a toad.
Gurgi: Oh, poor miserable Gurgi deserves fierce smackings and whackings on his poor, tender head. Always left with no munchings and crunchings.
Eilonwy: Weren't you a bit frightened, Fflewdurr?
Fflewddur Fflam: A Fflam frightened? That word is not in my vocabulary.
[harp strings vibrate; Fflewddur stops them]
Fflewddur Fflam: But in this case, well chosen, my dear.
Eilonwy: Aren't you charming?
Gurgi: And pungent, too.
Gurgi: No, master. Not go into evil cauldron.
Taran: If I don't, we're all lost. Out of my way.
Gurgi: Gurgi not let his friend die. Taran has many friends. Gurgi has no friends.
Taran: No, Gurgi! Don't jump! No!
[Gurgi jumps into Cauldron]
Taran: No!
Gurgi: If great lord go into evil castle, poor Gurgi will never see his friend again. Nope. Never.
Taran: What does a girl know about swords, anyway?
Eilonwy: "Girl"? "Girl"? If it wasn't for this *girl*, you would still be in the Horned King's dungeon.
[first lines]
Narrator: Legend has it, in the mystic land of Prydain, there was once a king so cruel and so evil, that even the Gods feared him. Since no prison could hold him, he was thrown alive into a crucible of molten iron. There his demonic spirit was captured in the form of a great, black cauldron. For uncounted centuries, the black cauldron lay hidden, waiting, while evil men searched for it, knowing whoever possessed it would have the power to resurrect an army of deathless warriors... and with them, rule the world.
[approaching Taran with fury]
The Horned King: You've interfered for the last time!
Creeper: Ha ha! Go for his throat, sire!
The Horned King: [shouting] NOW, PIG KEEPER, YOU SHALL DIE!
The Horned King: I presume, my boy, you are the keeper of this oracular pig.
Taran: I'm not afraid of the Horned King.
Dallben: Then you are a very foolish lad. Untried courage is no match for his evil. Just remember that.
Orddu: My, what funny little ducklings. Don't they know that the Black Cauldron is indestructible? Now listen carefully. The Black Cauldron can never be destroyed. Only its evil powers can be stopped.
Taran: Then there is a way. But how?
Orddu: A living being must climb into it of its own free will.
Gurgi: Gurgi is bold and brave. He will climb into the evil cauldron.
Orddu: However, the poor duckling will never climb out alive.
Gurgi: [jumping away from the cauldron] Yikes!
The Horned King: My, what a brave, handsome group. A pig keeper, a scullery maid, and a broken-down minstrel. Perhaps it would interest you to see what fate has in store for you.
Dallben: So much so soon, to rest on his young shoulders.
Taran: [to a goat] His majesty, the Horned King. So we meet at last. Ha!
[Taran rattles the goat's horns with his stick]
Taran: Even the Horned King shakes with fear. See, Hen? Everyone runs from the famous Taran of Cael Dallben.
[the goat butts Taran and knocks him down]
Taran: [pretending to die] Prydain's finest warrior draws his last breath.
Creeper: Oh, I'm sorry. I've ignored you. You did come for the Black Cauldron, didn't you? Good. Then climb in! It will only cost you your life.
The Horned King: [as he is being sucked into the Black Cauldron] No! You'll not have me! My power cannot die! Curse you!
Orddu: It's decided, then. You shall have the Black Cauldron.
Eilonwy: You mean, you'll give it to us?
Orddu: That's not what I said. You weren't listening. We never give anything away. What we do is bargain, trade.
Taran: Well, you'll not have my sword!
[Gurgi is hugging Fflewddur Fflam, who thinks he is being attacked]
Fflewddur Fflam: Help! Get this thing off me!
Gurgi: Oh, Gurgi's happy day!
[Gurgi puts on Fflewddur's hat]
Gurgi: Wow!
Fflewddur Fflam: Yes, keep it! It's a gift!
Gurgi: [Holding Fflewddur's harp] This! Gurgi want this!
Fflewddur Fflam: Take it! I'm sure you've murdered for less.
Gurgi: [offering Orddu an apple core] Gurgi will trade his munchings and crunchings.
Orddu: Who would want...?
Orgoch: Hold it, sister! Not so fast!
[takes core and eats it]
The Horned King: You bring news of the pig?
Creeper: N-n-not exactly, sire. It's the pig keeper. He-he-he's... escaped.
[the Horned King summons Creeper forward]
Creeper: Oh, no! Allow me, sire.
[Strangles himself]
Creeper: Isn't that enough, sire?
Dallben: Hen Wen, from you, I do beseech / Knowledge that lies beyond my reach / Troubled thoughts beyond your heart / Pray you now, those thoughts impart.
King Eidilleg: Tell me. Is the burning and killing still going on up there?
Fflewddur Fflam: You're refering to that-that-that-that joke on humanity, the Horned King.
King Eidilleg: Will no one stand up to him?
Taran: We've seen him. And if he ever finds the Black Cauldron, he'll kill us all.
King Eidilleg: Oh, no. He'll never find it. It's safely hidden, in Morva.
Taran: Morva?
King Eidilleg: At least I think it is. Isn't it, Doli?
Doli: [Angry] What? Is that one of my new jobs? Knowing where the Cauldron was last seen?
King Eidilleg: Don't worry. He'll find it. You'll see.
[as the army of the dead collapses]
The Horned King: This had better not be your fault!
[grabs Creeper by the neck]
Creeper: Perhaps it just needs another body, Sire.
The Horned King: Yes. *Yours*!
[repeated line]
Fflewddur Fflam: Great Belin!
Creeper: I did it, sire! I captured the boy.
The Horned King: But you let the pig get away, didn't you?
Creeper: I-It wasn't my fault.
[Horned King strangles Creeper]
The Horned King: Throw the boy in the dungeon!
Fflewddur Fflam: I'm Fflewddur Fflam, minstrel of minstrels! Balladeer to the grandest courts in all the land!
[harp string snaps]
Fflewddur Fflam: And I, uh, eh? Eh, well, have you forgotten? I have sung in some of the finest courts...
[another string snaps]
Fflewddur Fflam: Well, I'm only waiting for an invitation.
[another one snaps]
Fflewddur Fflam: Oh, shush. Why do you have to judge every word I say?
Taran: Have you seen my pig?
Gurgi: Piggy? Round, fat piggy? Big snout?
[snorts]
Taran: Yes, yes.
Gurgi: Curly tail?
Taran: That's her! That's Hen-Wen!
Gurgi: Uh-uh, Nope. Gurgi not seen piggy. Nope.
Orddu: We have business with your little hero.
Taran: Hero? Gurgi was the hero.
Orddu: The only thing that mattered to you was the Cauldron, but now it is of no use to you. So we shall take it and be on our way.
Fflewddur Fflam: Stay your hand, ladies. We never give anything away. We bargain, we trade. Remember?
Orddu: Did these old ears hear the word "bargain"?
Fflewddur Fflam: Yes, Madam, your old ears heard right.
Orwen: Oh, I just adore forceful men.
Fflewddur Fflam: Oh, pull yourself together, Madam.
The Horned King: Oh my soldiers... Soon the Black Cauldron will be mine. Its evil power will course through my veins, and I shall make you Cauldron Born. Yes. Yes. Oh, yes. Then you will worship me! Me... Oh, my soldiers. How long I have thirsted to be a god among mortal men.
Taran: For your sake, you'd better be telling the truth.
Gurgi: Gurgi not lie. Not this time.
[as he activates the Black Cauldron]
The Horned King: Now I call on my Army of the Dead; the Cauldron-born! Arise, my messengers of death! Our time has arrived!
[upon finding Gurgi harrasing a fallen Flewddur]
Taran: [angry] Gurgi!
Gurgi: Master? Uh... old man, uh... fell down!
[nudges Flewddur]
Gurgi: Get up! Get up!

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